Unli Chance

Nakapanood ako kagabi ng palabas sa telebisyon na ang title ay 2nd chance. It was a story about a couple who broke up after 8 years of being together then gave each other another chance. After watching it, napaisip ako. Do 2nd chance really work? Why do we say goodbye to someone tapos babalikan din pala natin? Is it really a smart choice if you give yourselves another chance kahit niloko ka na? Sabi nga nila diba, once a manloloko always a manloloko.

So many things were playing in my mind noong mga oras na yun. Feeling affected, hindi naman ako yung bida. Pero well, naisip ko lang kasi about giving the relationship another shot kahit nagkalokohan na. Paano naman kung paulit ulit ang pagbibigay ng chance? Yung tipong naging unli chance na. Yun kaya maituturing na pagmamahal pa din? Sa tuwing sinusubukan natin na ibalik sa dati ang relasyon, sino kaya ang binibigyan ng another chance? Chance ba yun sa atin para finally marealize natin na wala na talagang patutunguhan ang relasyon kaya it’s time to move on, o chance sa kanila para marealize nila na may isang taong nagmamahal sa kanila ng sobra pero dinededma nila dahil sobrang busy sila sa paghahanap ng iba? Hanggang saan ba talaga ang chance na dapat natin ibigay?

Ang hirap kapag pag-ibig ang pinaguusapan. Madalas nasasabi ko, bago hiwalayan, pag-isipan muna kasi baka magmukha kang tanga kung hihiwalay ka tapos babalik ka din pala. Minsan naman nasasabi ko, may mga bagay talaga na pinagsisisihan natin. Kung nagkamali ka ng desisyon at nakakita ng pagkakataon na baguhin ito, go! Try mo ang 2nd chance. Malay mo this time magwork na diba? Pag pumalpak pa din then tigilan mo na. Kaso hindi ganun ang nangyayari. Kadalasan din kasi satin, nasasaktan na ng paulit ulit pero sige lang, try pa din ng try. Minsan sinasabi natin na mas ok nang magtry kesa magkaroon ng mga “what if” sa buhay. Madalas naman pakiramdam natin na yung taong mahal natin eh sya na din ang huling mamahalin natin na para bang wala na talagang mas hihigit sa kanya kahit na napakadami naman dyan (hindi lang talaga natin pinapansin).

Ngayon napapaisip ako, ok lang ba kaya talaga ang 2nd chance? Eh ang unli chance? Bakit kaya may mga taong paulit-ulit na bumabalik sa taong paulit-ulit ding nananakit sa kanila? Sa mga hindi makapag let go, paano kaya? Masasabi pa din ba na tunay na pagmamahal yun o pagpapakatanga na? Kung paulit ulit kang umaasa na hindi ka na lolokohin at sasaktan ng taong mukhang hindi ka naman talaga mahal, paano ka kaya magiging masaya?

Paano kaya magkakaroon ng hangganan ang nakasanayang unli chance?

What I Love About You

Your eyes that steal my words away,

Your smile that makes my heart skip a beat,

Your sense of humor that brightens my day,

Your intelligence that impresses me a lot,

Your dedication to your work that inspires me,

Most importantly, your genuine heart and closeness to God that proves how great you are as a person.

These are just some of the many things I love about you and the reasons why I gave my heart to you. You will always have me no matter how hard the situation may be, for I am still hopeful that someday, the love that I am giving you will all be worth it.

Thank you for staying despite my mood swing.😊

Happy Valentine’s Day!

-mhaggie

Paano Mo Ba Ako Mamahalin?

Paano mo ba ako mamahalin?

Yan ang madalas na binibigkas ng aking isip at damdamin.

Ginagawa ko ang lahat upang ika’y mapasaya,

Mapatunayan ko lamang na sa puso ko ika’y nag-iisa.

Gusto kong maintindihan kung ako ba ay may pagkukulang,

O sadyang iba lang talaga ang laman ng iyong puso’t isipan.

Gusto kong malaman ang iyong nararamdaman,

Ako ba ay iyo nang minamahal,

O hanggang ngayon para sayo ako ay wala lang?

Sinabi ko sa sarili na lahat ay titiisin

Pinangako na habambuhay kang mamahalin

Ngunit tila ako pa din ay nababalewala

Kaya aking tinatanong, tama pa ba ang aking ginagawa?

Hangad kong maintindihan lahat ng dahilan,

Kung bakit ang aking nadarama ay di mo kayang suklian.

Ako ba’y hindi karapat dapat na mahalin?

O ang pagibig mo ay sadyang hindi para sa akin?

Handa akong makinig sa lahat ng sasabihin,

Sisikapin na gawin ano man ang hilingin,

Dahil ang puso’y ko’y walang balak bumitiw,

Mapatunayan lamang na ako’y karapat dapat ding mahalin.

Pansamantala akong lalayo sayo,

Hanggang dumating ang oras na ako din ay maisip mo.

Hindi ako titigil sa aking paghihintay,

Dahil nais ko na ang aking pagmamahal ay sayo lamang ibibigay.

Hinding hindi ako mawawalan ng pag asa,

Patuloy akong maniniwala sa aking nadarama.

Hihintayin ko na dumating ang panahon

Na maririnig ko sayo ang mga salitang “mahal kita”, “ikaw lang, wala ng iba”.

Jollibee’s “Vow” Follow-Up Commercial 

Earlier, I saw this commercial by Jollibee re: a girl who was friendzoned by her best friend, and later on became her bf (oh well, I assumed they became couple in the end).

(Jollibee commercial, posted in Jollibee’s official fb page) https://www.facebook.com/JollibeePhilippines/videos/1508406992538855/

(Full story, posted in Trending Moves’ fb page) https://www.facebook.com/Trendingmoves/videos/743032935881514/

I know many people believe that it is best to be friends first with someone before you enter into a romantic relationship with them. I have nothing against it, and at some point, yes, I agree because being labeled as “friends, for now” usually mean that 2 persons are giving theirselves time to know each other better. However, there are these people who do not consider their relationship with the opposite sex as “friends, for now” but instead, they see them as “just a friend”, just like how the guy in the commercial saw his girl friend, “just a friend” or his “best friend”.

I watched the video, and I couldn’t imagine myself falling in love with someone whom i consider as my “best friend”. I have boy friends, and I sometimes spend whole day and night hanging out with them. But being in a romantic relationship with any of them never really crossed my mind. Why? Because i believe in love/lust at first sight. 😁😉 Well, it’s not that I don’t find my boy friends attractive. They are very good guys and I know that they have what it takes to be the best boyfriend/husband in the world. I just value the friendship so much that I couldn’t put what we have at risk for something that I am unsure if will last forever. Pag kaibigan, kaibigan lang. Walang tablahan.🙂

The commercial is good but not all, I believe, can relate. That includes me.

Oh by the way, I think Jollibee did an effective marketing strategy. Look what I had for dinner.😊

Dear Mama Lola

I will never forget what you told me the last time we talk, and that is to “Never say anything bad about other people and never let the hate take root in my heart”. I felt more proud to be your granddaughter when I heard these words from you. You may have lost your memory, but the goodness in you remained. It’s sad to know that we will no longer enjoy our vacation the same way that we did before, but it’s ok because I know that you are now in a happier place, with Papa. We will all miss you, Mama! Thank you for taking good care of us and I thank God for letting you enjoy your life for 98 yrs. You will always have a special place in our hearts, Mama! We all love you!

My Life, My Choice

All of us have dreams. Probably all kids once imagined theirselves as somebody that they wanted to be. I remember when I was 5, i used to wait for 6 pm so I could be able to watch my favorite news program and see my favorite news anchor, Ms. Kara David, who by that time, was doing a documentary of the most recommended tourist attractions in the Philippines. I was really impressed by her job because I knew she was getting paid to travel and so I told my self that there’s nothing that I wanted when I grow up but to be just like her. I told my sisters about it and they gave my some ideas on how to be a great journalist: First, i have to be beautiful. I will be featured on television so being presentable all the time is a total must. Second, I need to posses excellent communication skill. I was really eager to make my dreams come true so I started training my self to pass the requirements. I didn’t mind spending hours in front of a mirror just to get my hair fixed. I always wanted to look gorgeous (yes, that’s how I was even when I was just 5). I kept myself focused on all my speech classes to ensure that I deliver every word perfectly. I did all these things as part of my preparation of becoming a journalist. Unexpectedly, challenges came my way, and it totally changed everything.

Different colleges and universities from all over the country were already accepting applicants for college. First dilemma, where to enroll? I promised I won’t be pursuing my college on the same school because I wanted to experience new environment and meet new people. But anyway, I can take an examination from different schools and just make a decision later after getting the result. That was what I did. When I was about to take the exam, there came my second dilemma, what course will I take? Journalism was the first that came to mind. Unfortunately, my family discouraged me to take the course due to limited opportunities. I thought of taking up Political Science instead so I can proceed to Law. But then again, I was discouraged because of the same reason. I might have a hard time finding a job that suits this course (unless I pursue Law after college and pass the bar exam). It was almost graduation week (March 2001) but I haven’t made up my mind yet. Thank God my sister introduced me to Psychology and I was enlightened.

My decision of taking up BS Psychology at University of San Agustin, Iloilo City was due to the following: First, it will help me know and understand why  a person acts the way he does. Second, Psychology is a pre-law course so I can still pursue law if I wish to. It’s also a pre-med course so I still have another option in case I change my mind. Third, practical reason. There is a greater opportunity of finding a stable job that will soon give me the chance to travel (though it will be at my own expense). And fourth, USA so I could do what my parents want. I wanted a different school, far from where I grew up, and my parents wanted a place that they really know. 

I enjoyed Psychology. I realized a lot of things and learned to understand people more. But honestly, I finished my 4-year course without any plan for my future. I wanted to work of course but as to where and what career will I be pursuing? No idea at all.

I spent few months traveling and hanging out with friends. I love going out. I love spending the day and night with people who are really fun to be with. I love to see and discover new things. But these cannot always be my priority. I need to work. I need to earn my own money. I want to prove my parents that their hard-works are all worth it.

It was January 2006 when I submitted my application for a staff position in one of the Companies in Subic. The opening was for purchasing staff but I guess it was really destiny that brought me to HR. According to them, they all got curious with my picture and wanted to know if I look the same in person. They checked my profile and found out that I was a Psychology graduate. I was then offered a position in HR. Luckily, I was able to pass the examination and series of interviews. Big thanks to my graduation picture because it helped me land a job (pun). Kidding aside, I went through a tough process of hiring. They tested my patience so hard that I almost gave up, but of course I didn’t because I really wanted to prove them that I was qualified for the job.

I handled Employee Behavior and Relations. It was challenging because I was tasked to do works that were related to disciplinary action, from giving warning to suspension and even termination. I worked for the Company for 2.5 yrs and because I wanted to explore more about HR, I decided to look for another job that will allow me to work as a generalist. There came another opportunity. It was August 2008 when I started working as HR Supervisor in an IT Company, located in Makati. I handled all facets of HR, from hiring to firing, and all other administrative jobs. I’m glad that I am still connected with the Company, as an HR Manager.

My career as HR practitioner gave me so much idea on how to deal with people. However, being in this profession required me to be more cautious with my actions. HR people are more often expected by many to be prim and proper, doing the right thing all the time. Well it’s not the typical me, but because I give so much importance to my work, I decided to be how people expect me to be. At first it was fun but later on I realized that I am missing a lot of things. I came to a point where I asked my self “Am I really happy?”, “Is this really how I want my life to be?”, “Is this the career that I really want to pursue?”. I have been in this profession for so many years now and I already attained a managerial position, but I still have to admit, yes, there were times where I thought of shifting into a more exciting career.

The confusion gave me sleepless nights but I have to do something about it. I tried analyzing the situation until I realized how much I love my job. I based my behavior on people’s expectations but I know it was my own choice. How I live my life now is my choice as well, and how I’ll be dealing with it still depend on me.

Now, I have made up my mind. I will continue to work as HR practitioner and will never be hesitant to show people the other side of me. Never mind the criticisms. It will always be there. I’ll just do what I want to do and people will get used to it. Important thing is, I am happy with my life and I am not hurting anybody for being me.